It does get better
Keeping up in school
When I was in school I was diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia. It all started when the bullying did. I never used to get on well in school, in fact, I was held back a year as I couldn’t keep up with the class’s abilities. But when I was in art, I kinda let my passion and feelings flow free into my work, the same with my music lessons. Math was a lesson I couldn’t cope at all in, I had to have a teaching assistant to help me because the teacher couldn’t help me every time I had a problem.
None of my class liked the teaching assistant. They used to think she was snobby, stuck up and just horrible because she helped our teacher out when controlling the class was needed. Out of class a group of boys said to me ”If you weren’t so stupid we could have some fun.“ I did have a couple of friends who would stick up for me, until they realised they were getting hate for doing so. The insults began to drag away from the actual reason that it started. They began to comment on my style, voice, how I acted, and how I looked. The tough thing was I walked home the same way as five of the boys, they continued shouting insults and cussing at me.
Those insults repeated themselves in my head, over and over. It brought me down a lot. Nothing would get these horrible thoughts out of my head. I hated myself. To the point I refused to leave the house. I thought all I’d do was mess something up, or cause someone to be upset.
After I moved the school I went to, I visited a support service. They listened to me about my feelings and some of the words they gave me made me happy. A lady at the support service called my mother. She suggested I get a counsellor.
Today I still suffer with schizophrenia, but it has never been as bad as it was before. I got some new friends in the end, some that would actually stick up for me through anything. I also got some help with my disorder, I got some medication, a counsellor and all the support I needed to feel happy again. It got better. Because I did something about it. Now I’m so grateful that there are amazing people to help you, no matter what you’re going through.
Thank you for reading my story.