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I think i might be bisexual

chess piecesWorking out your sexuality and whether you’re attracted to men, women or both is something that can take a bit of time, and there shouldn’t be any pressure to decide.

Everyone’s different, and being young is a time when you get to figure out what works for you. Below are some questions you might ask yourself when you are discovering what sexuality you are. At the end of the page there are links to organisations you can contact for further help and advice.

What does it mean to be ‘bisexual’?

People usually describe themselves as bisexual when they find that they are physically, emotionally and sexually attracted to both men and women. There are bisexual people in every country, culture and society. Some people report that they have bisexual feelings or experiences, but don’t identify themselves as bisexual (‘bi’). Sometimes it’s hard for people to stand up as bisexual because their society doesn’t accept it. In other situations, people are just happy to explore their sexuality while identifying themselves as mainly straight, gay or lesbian, or having no label at all.

Being bisexual can cause feelings of isolation for some young men and women because they feel pressure to be straight, gay or lesbian. There’s a fear that people won’t approve of bisexuality, which makes people scared to be open about themselves. Remember, having these feelings is completely natural and an expression of human emotion as felt by you. Though there may well be people who mightn’t understand, it doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with it or that it should stop you being yourself.

Why are some people bisexual?

There is no real explanation as to why some people are bisexual, or any sexuality. Some researchers suggest that we’re born with our sexual orientation, and others think that it could be something to do with our childhood experiences. Bisexuality it is part of the broad spectrum of human sexuality.

How do I know if I’m bisexual?

There’s no easy answer to this question. You can’t fill in an online test that will give you a definite answer. You might be bisexual if you recognise that you have feelings of attraction for women and men at the same time, but this does not necessarily have to be at the same time or intensity. What’s important is that you don’t deny your feelings and that you take time, at your own pace, to explore your sexuality and what being bisexual might mean to you.

It is also important to remember that you are definitely not alone, and you don’t have to deal with your questions or problems alone. Try talking BeLonG To if you are feeling concerned. And if someone tells you that bisexuals are really confused, that bisexuals don’t exist, or that they can’t help you, look for someone else to talk to who does understand and care.

How do I know if someone else is bisexual?

You can’t tell whether a man or woman or a transgendered person is bisexual just by looking at them. You cannot tell a bisexual person by the gender of their partner or the friends they keep. It is important to remember that if you identify as bisexual, how you look is up to you, just the same as if you are heterosexual, gay or lesbian. How you dress and how you behave is about your personal identity, not a stereotype.

Bisexual relationships

For some people relationships can be more complicated than for others – regardless of your sexuality. It’s always important to be open and honest with your partner/s, about feelings of attraction to other people. Like everyone else, bisexual people fall in love and form committed relationships. These may be with a man, a woman, a transgendered person, or with more than one person. There are no rules that people follow in relationships- everyone is free to make them up for themselves.

More information

Call, email or drop into BeLonG To, a support service for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender young people aged 14 to 23. Remember to talk to someone you trust. One of the best ways to deal with some of your issues is to talk them through, especially with someone who you know will understand you. Check out the benefits of talking to someone.

This article was last reviewed on 03 May 2017

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