Trying to live under your parents’ roof?
The leaves are turning and change is in the air. A new school year, moving to a different school, or going to college are big transitions. Maybe you’re working, or haven’t quite figured out the next step.
Whatever’s going on, this time of year often means change. It can bring greater independence, which is exciting, but if you’re living at home can be challenging too.
As we plough into autumn, the stresses of the year are probably beginning to show. An important aspect of growing and becoming more independent is management. Living at home, balancing the problems of everyday life and still being able to see the bigger picture can be a difficult skill to master.
Not least among the challenges in gaining independence is how to deal with your family relationships. As people grow it’s natural for there to be differences and sometimes even conflict with parents, or siblings.
It’s sometimes hard to adapt to the changing dynamic of a family. While you might have changed and feel more independent, it’s not always easy for parents to get used to this. They’ve been looking after you for a long time, and they’re probably trying their best.
Try to see the bigger picture
Remember, this your parents’ house. Why not try and enjoy their company while you’re still living there? It might be hard at first, but you could try the old adage “fake it ’til you make it”.
Chances are you won’t live there forever, so why not make the most of it? There may come a time when you’re glad you did.
Contribute to the household – financially if you can afford to, but certainly with things like house-work. Growing up and becoming more independent also means being more responsible. If you display a more grown-up attitude, your family might start to treat you in a more grown-up way.
The more independent we become, the more space we often need. This is especially true if we live at home, or if we share a room. Being clear with boundaries, time frames and maybe even schedules for the use of space is important.
Learning to communicate well and compromise is a useful skill – unfortunately we can’t have it our own way all the time!
No matter how big or small a problem seems, it’s always a good idea to talk to someone about it. Having a chat with friends and family can be a good support. But if you need it there’s face-to-face or online and telephone help available.